I am currently completing my masters degree, and like most programs, it is a lot of writing. I’ve noticed the different course structure of my classes. Some professors assign a lot of small assignments, while others assign fewer larger assignments. I’ve learned my preference is more frequent smaller assignments. These assignments seemed more meaningful because there was a word count and you had to choose your words wisely all while fulfilling the requirement of the assignment. These assignments encouraged me to read more, and get a better understanding of the topic before I began writing. I would much rather have a quality assignment versus an quantity assignment with many words that could include rambling just to meet the word count. 

This type of thinking transferred over to my friendships and relationships. Did I really need to “claim” having 15+ close friends when they weren’t adding anything to the relationship? I put claim in quotes because that’s exactly what was happening it was just a title because there was no evidence of true friendship. I had to take a closer look and ask myself why was I holding onto the thought that it was a requirement or the status quo to have a large friendship circle. If you would have told me that I wouldn’t be life long besties with my childhood friends or friends from my high school and early college years, I wouldn’t believe it. But almost 9 years later, it’s reality. 

It was a hard reality to come face to face with, but I’m glad I came to it. Some people you just outgrow., and that’s okay. When I accepted that some people were no longer friends but merely associates, I could focus my attention on developing the true relationships that were present. As I dedicated and devoted my time to developing these relationships, they’ve become stronger, and I became a better person because of it. 

I’m thankful for the lessons learned and the growth that took place to get here. The friends that are in my life are true and real. I can be honest with them, and they can be honest with me about any situation, and we still remain friends- no love is lost. Friendship is a gift, and I’m thankful I’ve been blessed with individuals that I can call friend, and in return call me friend as well. I’ll take quality friendships over quantity friendships any day!  

 

A year ago, I was in my job for a little over 2 years and I was just there, going through the motions. 8 hours a day, 5 days a week I showed up, did my job, and went home. That was not the way I envisioned my professional career so I knew something had to be done. I started looking for new ways to improve my job, or new things to learn in the department. After doing this, I discovered I still felt the same. So it was time to do something I hadn’t planned on doing – look for another job. I began my search internally, looking for opportunities within the organization (after all it is just the best place to work!). After unsuccessfully finding another internally, I began to look for opportunities externally both within the city and outside the city. I was desperate. Was I ready to leave the city definitely not, but at this point I was willing to try anything. 

A week before Christmas, an internal job caught my eye. I interviewed with the hiring manager that week, and peer interviewed the next week. I was to hear something the next week. I got a call from HR to discuss salary, so I’m thinking yea this is it. After the process being drawn out 4 weeks, and I’m getting more discontent with each passing week, I was notified I did not get the position. At that point I was over it. My job search was over. I went to work now with a renewed purpose that maybe this is where I’m supposed to be. Work was becoming purposeful again. I received an personal email suggesting I apply for a new position that was just posted. I was skeptical after the process I had just went through 2 weeks prior. I applied for the job, and interviewed within 4 days. Five days after the interview I received a call that I got the position! I hesitated a week, before I turned in my resignation notice, because the thing I thought I wanted most, didn’t seem appealing anymore. My coworkers had become family, and I felt like I was abandoning my family! During my last week, My coworkers surprised me with a going away dinner to include 2 of my best friends, and a going away lunch. Talk about water works! I think I went through an entire box of tissue on my last day. 

Monday came and I began my new job. Anxious, nervous, excited were all emotions that I went through that first week. I was learning a lot and enjoying the new opportunity. After the orientation period, I felt like I knew enough to be dangerous. I had settled into the role, and could function independently. But something was missing. I began second guessing the new opportunity and my decision. Is this where I’m really suppose to be? Am I really suppose to be doing this? I don’t know enough to be successful in this role! These thoughts began to consume me, making it difficult to enjoy the role I dreamed of, and difficult to sleep at night. When I have a trouble sleeping something is seriously wrong. I began to search deep within myself and had to let all these doubts, fears, and aspirations go. This is where I was suppose to be, and I would enjoy it. 

Over the past 2 months, I have really settled into my job and planted roots there. I’ve accepted that there is a learning curve, and I must give myself time to learn the job, and the people. Coming from a job where I was the go-to person for everything, to a job where I did not know anything was a challenge. This job change has been a learning experience. I’ve learned more about the organization, more about the job, and more about myself. This transition period was all about patience. The most important lesson I’ve learned was to be patient with myself! 

Last week I decorated a gingerbread house with my department- my new family!