No one of the first words a baby learns and uses. But somehow in my adult life I have lost the unction to use the word NO.  I especially hate to use the word NO when it is something that I know I can handle. Every Christmas my job sponsors a local elementary school. Last Christmas my department needed someone to lead the charge. Immediately everyone pointed at me since I was the only there from the previous year that was involved with the project. The manager said she would help with whatever but she just couldn’t commit to leading. I told them to give me a few days to decide.  I weighed the pros and cons and looked at my schedule over the next few days, and it just wasn’t looking good. I would be able to lead the project but I wouldn’t be able to dedicate the time and energy as much as I would like.  I talked it over with some coworkers who knew how full my plate was and they thought I was crazy for even considering it. After a week of wrestling with the idea, I let the team know that I wouldn’t be able to lead. 

I remember going home that night and crying because I felt like I let those precious children down. The one who stepped up to lead the team came and thanked me for declining because she had such a wonderful time learning about the class and making a difference in those kids life. One of my New Years resolution’s was to use the word no more. I often neglected myself for others. I would go to the mall with a list of something I was, and come out with bags for everyone but myself. Somewhere along the lines of caring for others, I neglected myself. Using the word no has been very freeing lately. I finally feel like the world doesn’t end if I say no. Who knew a 2 letter word could make such a difference. Learn to use the word no!

Sorry for the delay with a new post. Life has been busy but fun these last couple weeks including celebrating my birthday and going on vacation. I decided to return to the blog by sharing my story on why I started blogging. As previously stated in my first blog, I love to read. I will read anything with a love story and happy ending. About 5 years ago I started following Sarah Jakes on Twitter. She would post things that were light reading and the everyday young woman could enjoy. Eventually she started a website and she posted a series a blogs. After her website became very popular she released her book Lost and Found. My sister received the book as a graduation gift and when I felt the gift I knew immediately it was a book. So I opened her gift and asked for forgiveness later. I was so happy it was  Lost and Found. That night I began reading the book and I was able to complete it in a couple days. As I read the book I laughed, cried, and did some serious thinking. While reading the book, I realized how similar Sarah’s life as a Preachers Kid (PK) was similar to mine. But how would I know her story unless she wrote it and shared it. There are thousands of PK’s in the world and we can be such a help and encouragement to each other and others if we just shared our story. We have to share the good, the bad, and the ugly. This blog is not just for PK’s. It is for anyone I can help by sharing my story. Don’t be afraid to share your story. You never know who you may be able to help! 

On Wednesday evening June 17th, I went to church like I always do. When I got home the CNN alerts were going off notifying the world of the shooting at the Emmanuel AME Church in Charleston, SC. So many thoughts began to invade my mind. I too had went to Wednesday night service and made it home safely. I was grateful that I made it home from church, but my heart  ached for those who wouldn’t see their loved ones come home that evening. All 9 victims will be missed by their loved one’s but I am burdened for Rev. Pinckney’s wife and children. When I watched coverage from Rev. Pinckney’s funeral everyone that spoke, spoke of the love he had for the community, the church, and his family.  As I watched the service, I thought to myself that could be me. I am Malana and Eliana. My mother is Mrs. Pinckney. My father could have been Rev. Pinckney. My father too is a pastor and has been for all my life. I’ve never had to worry if he will it make it home from church. Considering where our church is located, some nights I probably should have worried, but every night my dad came home. In my church we are taught to love everyone even if they don’t look like us. Many Sunday’s people who don’t look like us with traditional church clothes, will enter our church, but we think nothing of it, and embrace them like we would any member. Malana and Eliana had to spend their first Father’s Day without their father on Sunday. They will graduate high school without their father. They will get married one day, but their father will not be there to walk them down the aisle. A father is a daughters first love, and Malana and Eliana have lost theirs at an early age. In the midst of grieving the death of her husband, Mrs. Pinckney has to explain to her daughters what has transpired, and how they will move on with their life. After hearing about the character of Rev. Pinckney, I can only imagine the character of his wife. Mrs. Pinckney will explain to her children about the traumatic event her family has experienced in the words of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. “I have decided to stick with love. Hate is too great a burden to bear.” I stand with you during this time Mrs. Pinckney. My prayers are with you Malana and Eliana!

I can deal with love at first sight, but married at first sight; I’m not too sure about that. I recently found a new show on A&E “Married at First Sight.” This show follows 3 couples through a social experiment. You meet your husband/ wife at the altar and you don’t even know their name! After the first episode I wrote the show off as another reality show, but the next Tuesday I found myself glued to the tv for another episode. As a hopeless romantic, I enjoyed watching the experiment unfold and watching these couples not only getting to know each other but getting to know each other as husband and wife. My favorite couple throughout the experiment was Jaclyn and Ryan. I enjoyed watching their story unfold so much, I wanted to audition for the show. They both went in the experiment with open minds and was willing to work through any bumps that came along the way. During the finale I was happy to find out Jaclyn and Ryan were choosing to stay married but during the reunion to see them in a different space with each other was hard to believe. At the conclusion of the reunion the host asked each couple their last thoughts. Jaclyn and Ryan shared that love is out there for everyone! I began to shed tears because I had begun to lose hope that love that would never find me. But it was during this moment that I received a bit of hope that love would indeed find me one day! Do I believe in married at first sight, not quite; but I do believe love has strange ways of finding you!!  

January 1998, a show hosted by Bill Cosby premiered “Kids Say The Darndest Things.” The basis of the show is that the host would ask a question to a young child who would usually respond in a “cute” way. Out of the mouth babes you’re gonna get the real truth.

Last night started off like any other Wednesday night Bible study. I come to church sit down follow along in my book, if one of my dumplings (that’s what I call my babies that sit with me in church) comes I set them up to play games on my iPad. About 15 minutes into Bible study, I hear the older kids in the back making noise. I got up, told them to quiet down, and went back into church. This is normal. I get back in church and I hear them again. I don’t go tell them to hush because I was once a kid at Bible study, and sometimes someone will tell a joke and make everyone laugh. This is what I tell myself to justify why I didn’t tell them to quiet down.

Bible study continues and they venture off into a topic too sensitive for my 5 year old dumpling to sit in. So I was taking her to the back with the other kids and they asked me to stay. Of course I will stay. I’m gonna use this time to check in with the kids, see how their summer is going.

In this 45 minutes I quickly learn that I was not cut out to be a teacher. Hats off to all the teachers. We have some kids that are new to our church so I also used this time to encourage them to get to know each other. The kids are asking each other questions, how old are you, what grade are you going to, what are you doing this summer. It’s the cutest thing. Since we’re at church I turn the questioning a little bit “What is something you want to do at church?”  The genuine answers they gave was heartwarming. Then I got an answer that was quite different. After she said it the first thing that came to mind was kids say the darndest things. Then it got real interesting. One asked could they all ask me a question. I was hesitant but said sure. The questions were so simple but things I never even noticed they paid attention to. One of the kids recently started wearing glasses so he asked what age did I start wearing glasses. Another asked when did I start working at the hospital. I didn’t even know she knew I worked at the hospital.

After I was tired of the hot seat, and the kids became restless, we went outside to play a little. I thought about my encounter with the kids that night and this thought immediately came to mind; you never know who is watching you and who is listening to you. Some questions you could tell the motive behind it based on conversations they’ve heard, and other questions that were in this child’s mind about someone they looked up to but never had the opportunity to ask.

I challenge you to slow down, and spend quality time with children. When you think you’re helping them, they are really helping you.

And when you spend time with them, I guarantee, this thought will cross your mind. Kids Say The Darndest Things!

Welcome to Anchored Love! 

For as long as I can remember I’ve been obsessed with pens. I was so obsessed I had a shoe box full of pens. These pens were medium point, fine point, gel tip; any type of pen you can think of. I just loved to write. As my love of writing continued, I developed a love of reading. One summer I read a 400 page book in one day. That’s just how much I loved reading. 

As I’ve grown older, I found the best of both worlds. My love of writing and my love of reading were united when I discovered blogs; which has prompted me to start my own blog. 

Why anchoredlove138? I have a thing for love and anchors. Love is a beautiful thing. Love is selfless. Love never gives up.  One of my favorite verses is 1 Corinthians 13:8 “Love never fails.” An anchor is defined as a person or thing that provides strength and support. A love that is anchored  never fail!  

Follow me , as I continue this journey of anchored love!  

Happy blogging!